Three Birthdays in Heaven...

Today we celebrated our little Owen’s third birthday in heaven. And although there have been tears, there has been joy in this day. Our beautiful Owen is such a gift and such a treasure. And although we miss him desperately, we are so blessed that he was, is, and will forever be our child.

This morning we awoke to a perfect, cloudless dawn. A birthday gift to us from our precious baby boy. And from that moment on, I could feel him with me today. With me as we bundled his little sister into boots and coat and trundled across the dewy grass toward his graveside. With me as the cold and frosty morning gradually gave way to the warmth of the afternoon sun, on this – Owen’s birthday, and the first day of spring. And I felt Owen with me as his grandparents and aunties and uncles and cousins gathered around his graveside, laying bouquets of flowers, children chatting in happy tones. And as his little sister chased bubbles across the wet earth, squinting to watch those that floated lightly heavenward.

Yes, it was a beautiful celebration today. Beautiful because we got to celebrate our little boy. To embrace his life. And to teach his little sister about the joy that we see in the life of her big brother. And as I watched the sparkle in her eyes as she opened birthday presents and dug little fingers into birthday cake, I could only imagine the sparkle that must be in Owen’s eyes at this moment as he celebrates his birthday, healthy and free of pain, in the presence of Jesus in Heaven. How I miss you, my little birthday boy. How very, very much I love you…

For those of you who could not join in our celebration today, a little journey in pictures…

Gifts for Owen's Sister and Cousins...

Cakes for Each Family Celebrating With Us...

Flowers for Our Sweetheart...

Three Birthdays in Heaven...

We Love You, Our Precious Baby...

Happy 3rd Birthday Owen.

We Will Love You Forever.

Owen's Story

In just a few days, our Owen will celebrate his third birthday in heaven. And wanting to honour my little boy and the great gift and blessing that he continues to be in my life and in the life of my little family, I have attempted to write his story. Writing Owen’s story has been a tearful process. But a beautiful one, too. And though this story is far from complete, it offers at least a little glimpse into our journey. There is much more that needs to be written. Much more than needs to be shared. But for now, just a little look into the life of our Owen. Our transforming gift. Our brightness after rain.

To read Owen’s story, click here.

Michael's Story

When I began this blog, my intention was that it would be Owen’s. That I would write about my first sweet son, his loss, and all that I have learned as a result. And it occurred to me  that perhaps Michael’s story would be told one day, but that I would tell it separately. The losses of my two boys were to me so different that it seemed their stories could not exist in just one place. And so I tried to begin telling the story that my heart understood. The story of my first sweet son. The story in which I saw beauty.

But as I sat down to write, the words eluded me.  I struggled to write Owen’s story in a way I have never before struggled to write. And then I realized the truth in it all. That their stories must exist in one place, because they already do. The stories of my two baby boys are forever written deeply within my heart.  I can no longer tell one without telling the other.

I could not write Owen’s story (or rewrite it for this blog, as it has been written before) without first telling the story of his new baby brother. The ache in my heart was too deep and too fresh. Baby Michael’s story needed to be told. His big brother Owen’s story will follow soon (I hope in time for Owen’s third birthday, just a couple of weeks away).

But for now, here is the story of my second precious baby boy. My sweet little peanut. The child of my heart. Writing Michael’s story has been an emotional journey. I have relived moments I want to forget. But also ones I will cherish forever. I am so glad to have written his story. And I am so honoured that it is mine to tell.

If you would like to read Michael's story, click here.